Teaser Scenes from Dark Boswell
a byproduct of fLAtDiSk SoftWorks
Rated TV-14/IGSV [Please see disclaimer at the end of the teleplay]
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SAMPLE SCENES FROM DARK BOSWELL V
13 EXT. EARLY EVENING, A DESERTED BEER BREWERY ALONG THE SINGLE-LANE CONCRETE HIGHWAY OUTSIDE OF BOSWELL, NEW MEXICO.
Spotlights send a rosy glare up two giant smokestacks, but the brewery is otherwise dark. A black 1947 Cadillac limousine turns off the concrete highway and pulls up to the guard station at the front entrance. A burly guard emerges from the station armed with a submachine gun and blocks the car. The camera tracks in as the rear passenger window rolls down.
GUARD

That you, boss? Kinda hard to see you shrouded in them shadows.
A black gloved hand emerges from the window, holding a German Lugar. A hooded shadowy figure speaks in a metallic voice.
HOODED SHADOWY FIGURE

Idiot!
The Lugar barks twice and the guard slumps to the ground.
HOODED SHADOWY FIGURE

Drive on!
The camera tracks back as the rear window rolls up and the limousine roars off toward the brewery. Sparkling glow with harp sounds. Prunella and Barbarello arrive dressed in slick provocative black jumpsuits, open to the waist, with matching spiked heels and accessorized jewelry.
PRUNELLA

Where are Ozzie and Rick? Can you sense their Supreme Good Guy essence?
BARBARELLO

That's our sister Daisy's special gift, Prune. I can foretell danger, though.
PRUNELLA

OK. Any danger around?
BARBARELLO

Just those eight armed guards behind you.
Eight burly guards advance on the Holyhell Sisters, armed with Lugars and submachine guns. Prunella races toward them, does a double flip, and kicks out to send two of the guards sprawling. Barbarello chops at her nearest attacker and punches him in the groin. He stumbles back into the man behind him, who accidentally shoots himself in the foot. Prunella takes another guard by the hair and swings him over her head, letting him plow down two other attackers.
BARBARELLO

Nice work, girl!
PRUNELLA

Thanks. I liked that thing you did with the groin.
BARBARELLO

Maybe we better sneak into the brewery and check out that shadowy villain in the cool Caddy?
PRUNELLA

Hey! Do you see that?
14 EXT. EFX. TWO BRIGHT DISCS APPEAR AND HOVER IN THE SKY ABOVE THE BREWERY SMOKESTACKS. CLOUDS BUBBLE AND CHURN. BEYOND THE SKY, A GREEN LIGHT.
 
SAMPLE SCENES FROM DARK BOSWELL VII
12 EXT. MEDIUM SHOT OF PINKIE AND DEDE IN BRIGHTLY COLORED TANK TOPS IN FRONT OF THE THONG POINT THONG FACTORY GATES.

PINKIE

I sort of like working here myself, I mean it isn't really that hard making the labels for thong boxes.

DEDE

It's sexist.

PINKIE

Making the labels for thong boxes is sexist?

DEDE

Making us wear thongs while we make the labels for thong boxes is sexist.

PINKIE

Oh. That. Hey! There's Frankie!
13 PULL BACK TO SHOW PINKIE AND DEDE ARE WEARING BRIGHTLY COLORED TANK TOPS, BRIGHTLY COLORED THONGS AND FASHIONABLE SNEAKERS AS THEY WALK TO FRANKIE'S ORANGE SUV IN THE THONG FACTORY PARKING LOT. FRANKIE IS WEARING A BLUE T-SHIRT, RED THONGS, A RED CAPE AND FASHIONABLE RED SLIPPER-SOCKS.

FRANKIE

Surf's up!

DEDE

I wish you'd stop saying 'Surf's up!' This is Thong Point, Ohio, for god's sake!

FRANKIE

Not for long. There's a rumor that we've been cancelled. Besides, the surf is actually up. Ten-footers, see?
Frankie points to the west.
14 EXT. EFX. NAUSEATING REVERSED CHOPPER SHOT SPIRALS THE VIEW TO 1000 FEET ABOVE THE PARKING LOT AND THE BILLOWING BLACK CLOUDS OVER A STORMY SEA TO THE WEST.
15 CUT TO: INT. FRANKIE'S ORANGE SUV LEAVING THE PARKING LOT.
Frankie drives with Dede seated close to him in front. Pinkie is in the back seat. Excessively loud, inappropriate pop music blares from the car CD player.

PINKIE

I've been wondering about that. How do you explain a beach with ten foot waves in Ohio?

FRANKIE

The meteors.

DEDE

Not to mention the strange glowing yellow snow that the meteor storm left behind. Frankie doesn't like that snow much, do you lover?

FRANKIE

That strange glowing yellow snow changed all of us in Thong Point, Pinkie.
Dede puts her arm around Frankie's shoulders and bends down to look at his thongs. Frankie ignores her.

DEDE (TO FRANKIE'S CROTCH)

Uh-oh. Told you not to mention that strange glowing yellow snow. Surf's down?

FRANKIE

Now, cut that out!

DEDE (GIGGLES)

It's low tide for Frankie whenever that strange glowing yellow snow is around.

PINKIE (GIGGLES)

You mean that strange glowing yellow snow makes his...

FRANKIE

I'm warning you, Dede!

DEDE (GESTURES)

Yep! That strange glowing yellow snow shrivels Frankie's surfboard to about one quarter-inch!
Frankie slams down on the breaks, jumps out of the SUV and flies away.

PINKIE (GIGGLES)

Touchy, isn't he?
Get the complete Dark Boswell Adventure eBook (rev 03/2006)
Absolutely Free in Adobe PDF format - Click Here!
DISCLAIMER: This work was created as a satire of certain current television series and is not intended to infringe upon any Copyrights held by the creators, authors, owners and producers of those series. The author hopes that the principals satirized herein will appreciate this work in the spirit of the humor in which it was created, have a good laugh, and not press charges.

fLAtDiSk voluntarily rates this teleplay TV-14/IGSV (Implied Goodtime Sex and Violence)

Dark Boswell is a byproduct of fLAtDiSk SoftWorks. fLAtDiSk NeTWoRk Privacy Policy.